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  Jokes > Dirty jokes : Letter from men to women

Letter from men to women


Dirty jokes Rating : 7.67, 6 votes. Reviews : 0 [add review]

FROM MEN TO WOMEN


GENERAL DISCLAIMER FOR ANY WIVES OR GIRLFRIENDS WHO HAPPEN
UPON A COPY OF THIS:


1) The floor is considered an acceptable clothing storage
location.


2) Never ask me to purchase feminine products. Assume that I
will come home with the wrong thing.


3) When watching TV hugging is always fine because I can
still see the screen. Kissing should only be done during
timeouts and commercials. Questions should also be limited to
this period as you stand a much better chance of getting an
immediate response.


4) When we are watching your show and I change the channels
during a commercial do not hassle me that they are over to
change the channel back. I always know when the timing is
right. Also, when we are channel surfing do not ask me to go
back, there was a good reason why I skipped it.


5) If you need help with the laundry, I am more than
willing to carry it from the bedroom to the washer. In my
mind this is half the chore and I am now free to return to
the couch.


6) If I mention that a male friend of mine is allowed to do
something it is not necessary for you to call his
wife/girlfriend to discuss it.


7) If you don`t like the way I am driving close your eyes.
And I would appreciate it if you would refrain from making
that reverse inhaling alarmed noise. I haven`t hit anything
yet and if I do it will be your fault.


8) I go clothes shopping to buy, never to look.


9) Just tell me what you want me to wear before I get
dressed. And remember that this takes me less than ten
minutes no matter what the occasion is. After all I am
getting dressed, not getting ready.


10) Don`t ask me if I prefer one outfit over another or if a
certain accessory should be worn or not. I consider this a
no win situation and would rather just wait for you to get
dressed while watching TV.


11) If you want me to put the seat down when I am finished
then you should leave the seat up when you are finished. It`s
only fair. And stop giving me a hard time about missing the
bowl. What do you expect from an organ that has a brain of
its own.


12) I will cook anything as long as it is on the BBQ.


13) Yelling to me across the house sounds exactly like
stadium crowd background noise to me. I am not ignoring you.




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