|
|
|
Doctor terminology-1
Medical jokes
Rating : 0.00, 0 votes.
Reviews : 0 [add review]
What doctors say, and what they`re really thinking:
"This should be taken care of right away."
I`d planned a trip to Hawaii next month but this is so easy and profitable that I want to fix it before it cures itself.
"Welllllll, what have we here...?"
He has no idea and is hoping you`ll give him a clue.
"Let me check your medical history."
I want to see if you`ve paid your last bill before spending any more time with you.
"Why don`t we make another appointment later in the week."
I`m playing golf this afternoon, and this a waste of time.
--or--
I need the bucks, so I`m charging you for another office visit.
"We have some good news and some bad news."
The good news is, I`m going to buy that new BMW. The bad news is, you`re going to pay for it.
"Let`s see how it develops."
Maybe in a few days it will grow into something that can be cured.
"Let me schedule you for some tests."
I have a forty percent interest in the lab.
"I`d like to have my associate look at you."
He`s going through a messy divorce and owes me a bundle.
"I`d like to prescribe a new drug."
I`m writing a paper and would like to use you for a guinea pig.
"If it doesn`t clear up in a week, give me a call."
I don`t know what it is. Maybe it will go away by itself.
"That`s quite a nasty looking wound."
I think I`m going to throw up.
"This may smart a little."
Last week two patients bit off their tongues.
"Well, we`re not feeling so well today, are we...?"
I`m stalling for time. Who are you and why are you here?
"This should fix you up."
The drug company slipped me some big bucks to prescribe this stuff.
"Everything seems to be normal."
Rats! I guess I can`t buy that new beach condo after all.
"I`d like to run some more tests."
I can`t figure out what`s wrong. Maybe the kid in the lab can solve this one.
"Do you suppose all this stress could be affecting your nerves?"
You`re crazier`n an outhouse rat. Now, if I can only find a shrink who`ll split fees with me ...
"There is a lot of that going around."
My God, that`s the third one this week. I`d better learn something about this.
"If those symptoms persist, call for an appointment."
I`ve never heard of anything so disgusting. Thank God I`m off next week.
Rating : 0.00, 0 votes.
Reviews : 0 [add review]
Previous joke
[ Medical jokes index ]
Next joke
Previous joke
[ jokes index ]
Next joke
More :
Popular jokes |
Most reviewed jokes |
Top Rated jokes
Reviews of that joke :
Reviews : 0, Rating : 0.00, 0 votes.
Post your review!
| |
|
|
|
Random jokes |
The Rev. Billy Graham tells of at time early in His careerwhen he arrived in a small town to pre... Read this joke...
National Public Radio recently reported that Monica Lewinskyhad been in an accident with her Sport Utility Vehicle... Read this joke...
|
|
Random joke |
Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I cannot accept,And the wisdom to hide the bodies of those people I had to kill today because they pissed me off... Read this joke...
Did you hear about the blonde who took an hour to cook Minute Rice?Did you hear about the blonde who got into the taxi, and the driver kept the "Vacant" sign up?Did you hear about the blonde who was an M... Read this joke...
|
|
Random Funny stuff
Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms... Read this joke...
Random pics
|
|
Funny stuff