Jokes Humor stories Pictures Videos Funny News Games

Home  |  Bookmark us  |  Submit / Upload  |   |  Random stuff  |  RSS feed  |  Funny sites(add)  |  About  |  Terms  |  Privacy  |  Contact us
Funny stuff
» Funny pictures
Funny pics gallery
Forum pics 130
Funny pics mix 6
Funny pictures 2714
Optical illusions 37
» Funny videos
Funny clips gallery
Banned videos 53
Extreme videos 203
Funny animals 101
Funny cartoons 85
Funny cats 74
Funny dogs 85
Funny videos 8996
Home made videos 33
Music videos 69
Parodies 28
Pranks 156
Sexy videos 89
Sport videos 175
Stupid videos 160
Wierd videos 6
» Funny news
Funny news 31635
News funnies 23
» Free Games
Games gallery
Action games 844
Cartoons 62
Casino games 39
Classic arcade 254
Fighting games 81
Free games 1799
Logic games 170
Photo puzzles 593
Racing games 201
RPG games 45
Shooting games 452
Sport games 333
Strategy games 196
» Funny jokes
Adult jokes 1626
Animal jokes 289
Bar jokes 620
Blonde jokes 1361
Bumper stickers 40
Computer jokes 430
Dirty jokes 239
Ethnic jokes 319
Funny Facts 1490
Gay jokes 117
Gender jokes 69
Holiday jokes 168
Humor jokes 819
Insults 4294
Insults jokes 114
Jokers 160
Lawyer jokes 530
Medical jokes 297
One liners 704
Police jokes 6
Politics jokes 304
Redneck jokes 473
Religious jokes 625
Work jokes 75
Yo mama jokes 127
» Humor stories
Funny poems 15
Funny stories 343
Humor Stories
» Sounds
Funny audio 338
Sound boards 80
Funny sitesFunny sites
Uber Humor

  Jokes > Blonde jokes : Barbie


Blonde jokes Rating : 0.00, 0 votes. Reviews : 0 [add review]

Yes, it`s hard to believe, but in 1999 Barbie turned 40 - just in time to greet the 21st century. And they`ve been 40 full, rich years indeed.
She began as a glamorous airline stewardess when she was introduced at Toy Fair in 1959. She soared into space as an astronaut in 1974, ran for president in 1992, and in 1997, she bore disability bravely, folding her first-ever bending legs into a wheelchair to become a role model once again for a newly identified market.
In every incarnation,nationality, and skin tone, she`s perfectly turned out, with accessories galore at her long slender fingertips. She`s Everywoman, she`s the Cosmo Girl, she has it all. So, what did Mattel think of next to meet the challenge of Barbie turning 40?
Why fight age? Why not capitalize on it in every way possible? Here are some ideas Mattel brought to the table as they considered producing a past 40 Barbie:
Bifocals Barbie:
Comes with her own set of blended-lens fashion frames in six wild colors (half-frames too!), neck chain and large-print editions of Vogue and Martha Stewart Living.
Hot Flash Barbie:
Press Barbie`s bellybutton and watch her face turn beet red while tiny drops of perspiration appear on her forehead! With handheld fan and tiny tissues.
Facial Hair Barbie:
As Barbie`s hormone levels shift, see her whiskers grow! Available with teensy tweezers and magnifying mirror.
Cook`s Arms Barbie:
Hide Barbie`s droopy triceps with these new, roomier-sleeved gowns. Good news on the tummy front, too: muumuus are back! Cellulite cream and loofah sponge optional.
Bunion Barbie:
Years of disco dancing in stiletto heels have definitely taken their toll on Barbie`s dainty arched feet. Soothe her sores with this pumice stone and plasters, then slip on soft terry mules. Colors: pink, rose, blush.
No More Wrinkles Barbie:
Erase those pesky crow`s-feet and lip lines with a tube of Skin Sparkle-Spackle, from Barbie`s own line of exclusive age-blasting cosmetics.
Soccer Mom Barbie:
All that experience as a cheerleader is really paying off as Barbie dusts off her old high school megaphone to root for Babs and Ken Jr. With mini van in robin`s egg blue or white, and cooler filled with doughnut holes and fruit punch.
Mid-life Crisis Barbie:
Ken has a young Swedish girlfriend, so it`s time to ditch Ken. Barbie needs a change, and Bruce (her personal trainer) is just what the doctor ordered, along with Prozac. They`re hopping in her new red Miata and heading for the Napa Valley to open a bed and breakfast. Comes with real tape of "Breaking Up Is Hard to Do."
Single Mom Barbie:
There`s not much time for primping anymore! Ken`s shacked up with the Swedish au pair in the Dream House and Barbie`s across town with Babs and Ken Jr. In a fourth-floor walkup. Barbie`s selling off her old gowns and accessories to raise rent money. Complete garage sale kit included.
Recovery Barbie:
Too many parties have finally caught up with the ultimate party girl. Now she does 12 steps instead of dance steps! Clean and sober, she`s going to meetings religiously. Comes with little copy of The Big Book and six-pack of Diet Coke.
Who knows when Barbie will have outlived her usefulness? From Dream House to Nursing Home, the possibilities and accessories are endless!

Rate this joke (settings)

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

Rating : 0.00, 0 votes. Reviews : 0 [add review]

Previous joke [ Blonde jokes index ] Next joke
Previous joke [ jokes index ] Next joke

More : Popular jokes | Most reviewed jokes | Top Rated jokes
Reviews of that joke : Reviews : 0, Rating : 0.00, 0 votes.

Post your review!

Name  :
Email   :
Rate    :
Text    : URLs cannot be posted here
Cool sites

Random jokes
1. It`s not a laugh to practice barking at 3a.m. 2. It`s wrong to back Grandma into a corner and... Read this joke...
Emus and kangaroos cannot walk backwards... Read this joke...

Random joke
An earthquake on Dec... Read this joke...
Four nuns were standing in line at the gates of heaven... Read this joke...

Friend Finder

Random Funny stuff

Yo momma like Crazy Eddie: She`s practically giving it all away... Read this joke...

Random pics
Funny pictures : Plumber cookies archive
Use parental controls to protect your kids : Wikipedia | Battle.