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Computer lingo guide
Computer jokes
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Log on - Adding a log to your wood stove Log off - Don`t add a log to your wood stove Monitor - Keep an eye on the wood stove Megahertz - When a big log drops on your bare foot in the morning Floppy disk - What you get from piling too much wood into your wood stove Ram - The hydraulic machine that makes the woodsplitter work Drive - Getting home during most of the winter to your wood stove Hard drive - Trying to get home during a heavy snow storm Prompt - What you wish the mail was during the snow season Enter - Come on in Windows - What you must shut when the temperature hits 10 below Screen - What is a must during black fly season Chip - What you munch during a football games Microchip - What`s left in the bag when the normal chips are gone Modem - What you did to your fields last July Dot Matrix - Eino Matrix`s wife Laptop - Where the grandkids sit Keyboard - Where you`re supposed to put the keys so the wife can find them Software - Plastic picnic utensils Mouse - What leaves those little turds in the cupboard Mainframe - The part of the house that holds up the roof Port - Where the commercial fishing boats dock Random Access Memory - When you can`t remember how much you spent on the new deer rifle when wife asks about it
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