Jokes Humor stories Pictures Videos Funny News Games

Home  |  Bookmark us  |  Submit / Upload  |   |  Random stuff  |  RSS feed  |  Funny sites(add)  |  About  |  Terms  |  Privacy  |  Contact us
Funny stuff
» Funny pictures
Funny pics gallery
Forum pics 130
Funny pics mix 6
Funny pictures 2714
Optical illusions 37
» Funny videos
Funny clips gallery
Banned videos 53
Extreme videos 203
Funny animals 101
Funny cartoons 85
Funny cats 74
Funny dogs 85
Funny videos 8996
Home made videos 33
Music videos 69
Parodies 28
Pranks 156
Sexy videos 89
Sport videos 175
Stupid videos 160
Wierd videos 6
» Funny news
Funny news 31635
News funnies 23
» Free Games
Games gallery
Action games 844
Cartoons 62
Casino games 39
Classic arcade 254
Fighting games 81
Free games 1799
Logic games 170
Photo puzzles 593
Racing games 201
RPG games 45
Shooting games 452
Sport games 333
Strategy games 196
» Funny jokes
Adult jokes 1626
Animal jokes 289
Bar jokes 620
Blonde jokes 1361
Bumper stickers 40
Computer jokes 430
Dirty jokes 239
Ethnic jokes 319
Funny Facts 1490
Gay jokes 117
Gender jokes 69
Holiday jokes 168
Humor jokes 819
Insults 4294
Insults jokes 114
Jokers 160
Lawyer jokes 530
Medical jokes 297
One liners 704
Police jokes 6
Politics jokes 304
Redneck jokes 473
Religious jokes 625
Work jokes 75
Yo mama jokes 127
» Humor stories
Funny poems 15
Funny stories 343
Humor Stories
» Sounds
Funny audio 338
Sound boards 80
Funny sitesFunny sites
Uber Humor

  Jokes > Medical jokes : Actual doctor's notes

Actual doctor's notes

Medical jokes Rating : 0.00, 0 votes. Reviews : 0 [add review]

These are doctors` notes on patients` charts: (Actual notes
- unedited!)
1. Patient has chest pain if she lies on Her left side for
over a year.
2. On the 2nd day the knee was better and on the 3rd day it
disappeared completely.
3. She has had no rigors or shaking chills, but Her husband
states she was very hot in bed last night.
4. The patient has been depressed ever since she began
seeing me in 1993.
5. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also
appears to be depressed.
6. Discharge status: Alive but without permission.
7. Healthy appearing decrepit 69 year-old male, mentally
alert but forgetful.
8. The patient refused an autopsy.
9. The patient has no past history of suicides.
10. Patient has left His white blood cells at another
11. Patient`s past medical history has been remarkably
insignificant with only a 40 pound weight gain in the past
three days.
12. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for
13. Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady
14. Since she can`t get pregnant with Her husband, I thought
you might like to work Her up.
15. She is numb from Her toes down.
16. While in the ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent
17. The skin was moist and dry.
18. Occasional, constant, infrequent headaches.
19. Patient was alert and unresponsive.
20. Rectal exam revealed a normal size thyroid. (ouch!)
21. She stated that she had been constipated for most of
her adult life, until she got a divorce.
22. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for
physical therapy.
23. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and
24. Exam of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.
25. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
26. The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he
took a job as a stockbroker instead.
27. Skin: Somewhat pale but present.
28. The pelvic examination will be done later on the floor.
29. Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. Blank, who
felt we should sit on the abdomen and I agree.
30. Large brown stool ambulating in the hall.
Patient has two teenage children, but no other

Rate this joke (settings)

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

Rating : 0.00, 0 votes. Reviews : 0 [add review]

Previous joke [ Medical jokes index ] Next joke
Previous joke [ jokes index ] Next joke

More : Popular jokes | Most reviewed jokes | Top Rated jokes
Reviews of that joke : Reviews : 0, Rating : 0.00, 0 votes.

Post your review!

Name  :
Email   :
Rate    :
Text    : URLs cannot be posted here
Cool sites

Random jokes
A guy walks into a bar and orders 5 shots of whiskey... Read this joke...
If you can`t live without me, why aren`t you dead already?... Read this joke...

Random joke
Some day you will find yourself - and wish you hadn`t... Read this joke...
Why don`t you bore a hole in yourself and let the sap run out?... Read this joke...

Friend Finder

Random Funny stuff

A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractiveblonde female neighbor came out of the house and went straight tothe mail box... Read this joke...

Random pics
Funny pictures : Just One Glass-1 archive
Use parental controls to protect your kids : Wikipedia | Battle.